i cried again:(

DEPRESSED?!
AM I?

DONT WORRY, I'M STILL ALIVE.
MY TIME IS NOT UP YET THOUGH SOON.
FIND IT WEIRD TO NOT SEE ME ONLINE ON MSN?
NAH...
I'M JUST TIRED OF SPEAKING AND SOCIALIZING.
IF I SPOKE TO YOU WITHIN THIS FEW DAYS THEN COUNT YOURSELF SUPER LUCKY OR SUPER UNLUCKY FOR THAT.
IN EITHER WAYS, I SHALL APOLOGIES FOR THAT.
SORRY PEOPLE, JUST LEAVE ME ALONE.
SORRY FOR LETTING YOU WORRY IF ANYONE DID BUT WELL, THAT'S NOT LIKELY THE CASE COS NOBODY CARES ABOUT ME.
I'M JUST A LOSER, I KNOW THAT FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART.
DONT HAVE TO REMIND ME(:

I NEED TIME TO CHILL MY SENSE AND BRAIN.
ytd was a terrible nightmare for me.
its a strong struggle between me and the water in my eyes,
well, i lost.
i cried. so what if i've cried?
i still didnt get what i wanted.
all those cares have gone far away into Netherlands and i could never find them back again.
when i cried, i thought of one person.
I wanted to text that person but after typing, i saved it in Draft.
I didnt send it out cos its middle of the night and i dont deserve that person's time at all.
sad to say, i'm friendless now.